Sex and the Church — Pornography and sexual addiction

The Church must confront pornography in many ways due to its ever-changing guises. Most compelling in the confrontation are the heart-wrenching circumstances that pornography often engenders.

Consider this, a congregation discovers the pastor’s computer has been accessing pornographic websites. After confronting him, the members discover the pastor’s son was sneaking into his father’s office and accessing the websites. The son frequently did so while his father was attending church committee meetings.

This may be a unique situation, and sadly, maybe not. One thing is certain, church leadership across the connection is grappling with situations where clergy become addicted to pornography, ruining careers, lives and undermining ministry in local congregations.

The United Methodist Church is unequivocal in denouncing pornography:

Throughout the Bible, themes exist that highlight the imperfect nature of humanity and the hope for redemption through our relationship as God’s children held in God’s loving arms. The Old Testament laws of purity invite an understanding of the body created in God’s image and accountable to God through right relationship. Christ shared with us a vision of the world that confirms our vulnerability and affirms sacred personhood. Jesus Christ provides a path to a loving and protective relationship with God and with others; treating our neighbors and families with love thereby fostering healthy physical and emotional relationships.

John Wesley described the path to right relationship with God toward achieving invitation into God’s kingdom as a journey toward Christian perfection. We struggle mightily throughout life to move toward that vision of Christian perfection in an imperfect world … Understanding pornography to portray violence, abuse and humiliation in a sexual setting, and understanding any sexually explicit depiction of children to be pornographic, we affirm that The United Methodist Church is opposed to pornography. We further affirm our commitment to quality sex education. (2008 United Methodist Book of Resolutions, Resolution #2081)

Contemporary realities

A commonly accepted definition of pornography is sexually explicit material that portrays violence, abuse, coercion, domination, humiliation or degradation for the purpose of arousal.

Pornography’s availability has exploded.

The era of pornography primarily available in cover-wrapped magazines and films in “adults-only” stores is gone. Pornography’s availability has exploded. Internet and other wireless technologies have created new arenas with very easy access to it, especially in your own home.

The wireless world also has enabled availability in new, disturbing ways. This easy accessibility has engendered alarming trends.

Types of pornography have changed dramatically, too. They are increasingly violent in nature.

This shift and the easy accessibility has led to an upward trend in people addicted to pornography, sexual exploitation of women and children, and crimes against them. Consequently, combating pornography remains a lofty goal today.

Societal views of pornography vary greatly. On one end of the spectrum, persons view adult pornography as relatively harmless: an enhancement to relationships. On the other end, persons view it as deviant and criminal behavior against women and children.

Changes concepts

Pornography does degrade and exploit women and children. It can significantly change a person’s concept of healthy sexual behaviors and boundaries.

Consider that pastor’s son who accessed pornography on the church’s computer. What will be his understanding of healthy sexual relationships?

These incidents significantly shape a person’s sexual identity in dysfunctional ways.

Research tells us that these incidents significantly shape a person’s sexual identity in dysfunctional ways. For example, two young boys, ages 10 and 11, viewed pornography on a home computer. They then acted out the sexual acts with an 8-year-old girl in their neighborhood, including raping her.

Internet and wireless pornography, especially on cell phones, has grown particularly fast. According to one study, fully 20% of searches on the Internet involve pornographic images. Newsweek reported on the growing incidence of workplace time spent surfing pornographic websites.

Noted therapist Ian Kerner pointed out in an interview on CBS-TV’s The Early Show that the proliferation of Internet pornography accounts for a troubling upward trend in sexually compulsive behaviors.

Sexual addiction

The greater access to pornography via the Internet and cell phones has contributed to sexual addiction. This includes influencing persons once addicted solely to adult pornography to move to child pornography for greater sexual satisfaction. The Internet provides access to deeply disturbing material including “how-to” and “grooming” manuals intended for child pornographers.

At a Board of Directors meeting of the United Methodist General Board of Church & Society (GBCS), the head of Promise to Protect provided a detailed depiction of material easily accessible on the Internet. The description was so graphic and the material he described so easily accessed via the Internet that GBCS board members listened in stunned silence.

Pornography has been studied extensively as it relates to sexual addiction. Dr. Jeffrey Carnes, considered the foremost expert in the study of sexual addiction, says “a culture is shaped by how people treat each other.”

A recent study of college students shows that 40% viewed Internet pornography at around the age of 10 years. Carnes says many parents are unaware of the availability and accessibility of Internet pornography to their children.

Much pornography features degradation and violence. A lot of it features young, almost child-like women. Carnes says that male addicts his recovery center treats often say they cannot become aroused simply by interacting with a woman. They need pornography to become aroused.

Carnes explains that this addiction is not simply psychological. He says physiological changes manifested in the brain condition a person, transforming understanding and behavior in sexual relationships.

Challenges and opportunities

Counteracting this virtual tsunami of material is daunting. A common method of dealing with pornography is criminalizing the user while doing little to stem production of the material itself.

A comprehensive approach requires:

A comprehensive approach also requires that parents, teachers and church leaders strictly monitor computer and cell phone usage. Strict monitoring is important protection, not only for a church’s computer security, but in setting the tone that this material is unacceptable usage.

In preparing to write this article, for example, I notified GBCS’s human resources and tech support staffs about my online research related to it. I did so because GBCS’s computer system would have blocked my access and locked me out for conducting searches employing commonly used terminology to describe sex addiction and pornography. Such computer systems restrictions should be basic to any comprehensive approach.

Societal protections also involve endeavors such as Promise to Protect’s online tool for law enforcement to identify where pornographers are plying their wares. Prevention measures must go beyond just ensuring that pornographic magazines do not get into the hands of young people. Software programs are available that can protect children from pornographic spam. The software limits access to sites culpable in advertising pornography websites, as well.

United Methodist Resolution 2801, “Pornography & Sexual Violence,” outlines concrete steps to take in creating awareness and advocating change in addressing pornography. These include:

1. Action toward developing effective societal and governmental policies that eradicate child pornography, adult exploitation and enslavement;
2. education to encourage healthy relationships and behaviors;
3. compassion and encouragement for rehabilitation and recovery of addicts, their families and victims;
4. sensible laws that focus on a restorative justice model; and encourage incarcerated persons to pursue rehabilitation and recovery.

The resolution calls upon The United Methodist Church, its general agencies, annual conferences and local churches, to:

1. educate congregations about the issue of pornography, especially Internet pornography, and enact strict oversight of church-owned computers;
2. seek strategies to reduce proliferation of pornography;
3. work to break the link between sex and violence;
4. monitor and limit access by children and youths to pornography and sexually explicit material;
5. participate in efforts to ban child pornography and protect child victims;
6. promote the use of United Methodist and other quality sex education materials that help children and youths gain an understanding of and respect for mutually affirming sexuality;
7. provide educational sessions for parents on minimizing the risk to children from Internet usage. Encourage parents to establish rules for teenagers and children; encourage parents to utilize screening technology;
8. call for social responsibility in all media, including the Internet and in all public libraries, and work with local, national and international groups that advocate for global media monitoring of images of women, men and children; and
9. participate in ecumenical and/or community efforts that study and address the issue of pornography.

Pornography has changed, enabled by advances in technology that make its availability ubiquitous. Furthermore, technology has enabled purveyors of pornography to more easily distribute it, including prolific enticements to get you to try it. These “advances” have been accompanied by disturbing trends of violence and addictions heretofore little understood.

Pornography may be in the eyes of the beholder, but its powers to corrupt should offend us all. Creating circumstances that undermine ministries, families and lives.

Questions for discussion

1. What societal mores contribute to this flourishing industry?
2. Do you believe that the U.S. constitutional right to free speech should protect the pornography industry? Why or why not?
3. If a marriage therapist encouraged you to view pornography as an important step in overcoming sexual dysfunction in your marriage, what would you do?
4. The Internet is now the principle source for pornographic material. How can healthy boundaries be fostered around Internet usage?
5. Has your church encouraged healthy dialogue around sexual relationships? If not, what are the obstacles to healthy dialogue and how can they be overcome?

Author’s note: If you intend to do further research and dialogue in your congregation on this issue, be sure that a strong virus protection program is installed on your computer. In addition, do not open a search engine such as Google and search by words such as “pornography” “pornography addiction” “sex addiction help,” etc. These will probably lead to your computer being inundated with pornography solicitations. Instead, you should go directly to legitimate resources such as the following.

Resources for more education and information about pornography and addiction:

Abrams

Editor’s note: The Rev. Cynthia Abrams serves as program director of Alcohol, Other Addictions & Health Care for the United Methodist General Board of Church & Society. She earned her Bachelor of Arts degree at the California State University at Long Beach in Broadcast Journalism and her Master of Divinity at the Claremont School of Theology. Abrams is a clergy member of the California Pacific Conference and served local pastorates from 1993-1999. She also served the connection as a board member of the General Board of Discipleship and United Methodist Communications. From 1999 through 2003, Abrams served as the Executive Director of the National United Methodist Native American Center.